In the last 30 years the number of women working within the funeral profession has more than doubled*.
To help us get a better understanding of what it’s like to be a woman in the profession, we got insight from the women of one of our independent funeral directors. We spoke to Sue, her daughters Jayne, Jacqui and daughter-in-law Kerry of Kevin Lownds Funeral Services. They told us about their experiences, how they got into their roles and if they think any barriers remain to women entering the profession today.
How did you get into working in the funeral profession?
Sue: I had always been able to see the love my husband Kevin had for his job, it’s part of who he is. It had always been his dream for us to open our own family run funeral directors where we could offer the best care with no limitations. So together we made a plan and set up Kevin Lownds Funeral Services. Having worked in nursing for many years and for the last 15 years on a Paediatric Intensive Care Unit, care in difficult times was what I was trained to do. Many of my skills have been transferable to the role I have here.
Jayne: My previous job was managing a flag ship store for a cosmetics brand and training those from other stores in the use of cosmetics and skin care. I had always had a passion for makeup and how it made people feel. When my mum and dad contacted me to ask if I would be willing to come and do the makeup of a young woman they were caring for, I of course said yes. The woman’s family said she was very particular about how her makeup was done so I wanted to make sure it would be just as they remembered.
Jacqui: Growing up I saw the job satisfaction my dad got from helping families through grief knowing he could make a difference. I was a teacher before I joined the family business, I had always been very organised and patient. I knew I could become an asset to the business and wanted to offer my skills to help those who needed us .
Kerry: After helping the family at the annual Christmas Memorial Carol Evening, it was overwhelming and touching to see all the love and support. Seeing person after person approach Kev, Sue, Jacqui or Jayne and continue passing on their thanks, weeks, months, even years after the funeral had taken place made me proud of my family. It’s a unique job that presents you with the opportunity to help people every day and I wanted to be a part of it.
What have been the toughest aspects of working in funeral services for you?
Sue: Seeing people go through the worst times in their life, offering everything we possibly can but knowing we can’t take their pain away. I would say that is the toughest part of the job.
Jayne: The toughest part of this job is, there is no dress rehearsal. There is no second chance, only one chance to make sure everything is perfect. It’s an honour to be asked to be involved in the last chapter of someone’s journey.
What is the most rewarding part?
Jacqui: Hearing families tell us, ‘it feels like family,’ or ‘you couldn’t have done anything more, you went above and beyond’ is all we could wish for. I feel proud every day to put on my uniform and stand side by side with my family to be there for those who need us.
What have been some of the most memorable funerals you’ve worked on?
Kerry: When people have a theme, whether that be a colour, northern soul, superheroes, rock and roll, sparkles just to name a few, we have seen it all. I love to see how funerals can become completely bespoke. That can be done in very simple ways, with music and flowers, or with the complete extravagance of costumes and 50 people on motorcycles. The aim is to celebrate each life and there are thousands of ways to do it and I love that.
Do you think there are any barriers to women entering into a career in the funeral profession today?
Jayne: I think the only barrier for women in the industry is some people thinking there should be a barrier. There have been times I have felt resistance or patronising tones, but I am confident that I do my job well. I am more than capable just like my mum, my sister and my sister in law. In the time I have been in the industry I have definitely seen a change in the tide. I see more respect, people who value my opinion and I receive praise for the job I do.
Sue: With us being a female-dominated business in a male-dominated industry we have definitely noticed there are still old-fashioned ways of thinking out there, doubting the strength of women. But we have also seen far more positives than negatives. We are proud to be females in this industry, and I’m a very proud mum. I see my daughters and daughter-in-law support people when they need it most.
In what has been a traditionally male-dominated profession, it’s great to see increasing female representation in the industry. We look forward to seeing more women entering the profession in the years to come.
